Today on twenty fourth December, Yours Truly, the owner of this blog is twenty four years old! Assuming an average life expectancy, I have already spent almost half of my life on planet earth. The past had been good and future looks promising provided I put some hard work.
But at this very moment, I must admit I really do not know why I have been doing what I have been doing and what I want to do in life. I have started thinking now-a-days what life is all about and why is I alive here.
I do not want to write anything further but would like to quote from a passage I came across titled Being Twenty-Something, It's Really Hard, the source of which I actually do not know. I think it sums up the dilemma to an extent.
They call it the Quarter-Life Crisis. It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You look at your job, and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing. Or you realize that you are going to have to start at the bottom of hierarchy, and that really scares you. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.
You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward. You get your heart broken easily and wonder how someone you loved so much could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. You question your existence, you're beliefs and all that you thought was right. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, and the future and making a life for yourself...and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!